In 1959 a Swiss psychologist, Marie-Louisa von Franz, noticed the increasing trend in people who mature physically but remain psychologically stunted, especially among the male population of the western world. She coined the term for these people ‘eternal child’, today we call it the man child.
It’s not unusual for the man child to live at home or have moved back home in his thirties and even forties, middle aged. His mom still washes his clothes and cooks his meals, makes his bed and cleans his room. It gives his mom an ongoing sense of value, being needed, in her golden years so she gladly takes care of him like he’s still a child. Some studies estimate that 35% of adult men live at home now, the highest percentage in 80 years, and the trend is on the rise. Remember when being a “momma’s boy” was considered weak and girly, now it’s almost the norm.
For those that do eventually move out and have their own home, it’s not a man’s home. A man’s home used to have a library, a place of study and learning for acquiring knowledge and wisdom. Filled with both fiction and non-fiction books, travel guides, 12-year-old scotch and Cuban cigars. A mahogany desk, a leather chair, a banker’s lamp and pen and pad for writing letters. The man child, on the other hand, has a ‘Man Cave’ with a home cinema size TV for watching football, surround sound, cinema style seating with cup holders and a refrigerator stocked with ‘mmmm’ beer. There’s a dart board, popcorn machine, bobble heads of their favorite athletes and sports paraphernalia hanging on the walls. It’s a place for ‘hanging out’, escaping reality and getting ‘wasted’ with other beer-bellied jock sniffers.
The man cave is also a place to hold their fantasy football draft. There was a time when men played tackle football without pads in the park but the man child only fantasizes about things in life that he can’t actually do himself. Like staying up till all hours ‘gaming’ online against other man children and actual children. Pretending to be the super hero in some virtual reality online video game. Locked away in his mom’s basement or his man cave with his VR glasses on, controller in hand, and his big gut hanging out while stuffing Cheetos down his gullet and swilling Red Bull.
The man child doesn’t try to hide his adolescent mindset and childlike behavior. He proudly displays it for all to see at work. His cubicle is adorned with ‘Star Wars’ and ‘The Hobbit’ posters, desktop action figures of Obi Wan Kenobi, Indiana Jones and the Starship Enterprise. His screensaver is Harry Potter, his ringtones are the Star Wars and Star Trek theme songs, depending which of his Comic-con friends is calling. Comic-con is a convention where grown adults dress up in the costumes of their favorite action hero comic book characters to party and talk about comic books. They argue which characters could beat the others, as if they are real. It’s the man child’s mecca, the pilgrimage must be made.
It’s similar to the Civil War re-enactors who dress up like Civil War era soldiers and pretend fight. There’s a disturbing and obvious trend of men living a pretend life, creating a fantasy existence in all aspects in which they can immerse themselves to escape reality and they are legion. The man child is a hit at the box office, Hollywood picked up on it decades ago back in the late eighties and early nineties beginning with the series of ‘Pee Wee Herman’ movies, ‘Arthur’, ‘Dumb and Dumber’, ‘Ace Ventura’, ‘Grandmas Boy’, ‘Billy Madison’, ‘Big’, ‘Elf’, ‘TED’, ‘Step Brothers’, ‘Old School’, ‘Failure to Launch’ to name a few from a very long and infamous list. Actors like Jim Carrey, Will Ferrel, Adam Sandler, Owen Wilson and Vince Vaughn have made a career perfecting the man child in cinema. Network TV has claimed its share as well with animated series like ‘South Park’, ‘The Simpsons’ and ‘The Family Guy’ all of which use adolescent potty humor to make adults laugh. Where have all the real men gone?
“Where have all the real men gone?”
I can’t answer that question, only note that there are a few of us (thousands at the most) scattered across sporadically across the globe, with no real coordination to counter the machinations of the institution known as the “state.”
In layman terms, we are doomed.